‘Scuse Me?

About a month ago, I bought a Coby 40GB PMP to keep Tony entertained during long road trips or whatever. So far, it seems to be doing the trick and he loves it. (I currently have Cars and The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie copied to it.) And when he’s not using it, I can, so it works out great.

Anyway, we went to Sam’s Club on Friday to buy whatever we needed for a party we were having on Saturday. (What, you never got an invitation? My bad.) I had brought along the Coby media player to keep Tony occupied while we shopped. And yes, it did the trick.

Our first stop was the snack bar since the place gets rather busy after 12 pm. We timed it just right—the line was short and we didn’t wait long.

We packed the cart with our items and headed for the checkout lanes which, like Costco’s, are always long and move slowly since people tend to buy bulk quantities at either place. Either is not exactly where you need to go if you’re buying a bottle of cheap booze and a loaf of bread—like the lush who got in line behind us.

As she mumbled in her cigarette-ravaged, Lucille Ball voice to her male counterpart about how long the lines were and how slow they were moving, she glanced at Tony who was watching Cars on the media player with the same intensity he displays at home.

There was a brief moment of silence once she noticed him and then she sputtered sotto voce, “That kid has a f***ing DVD player.”

‘Scuse me, “lady”? Jealous much? Bitter? Maybe it was a little of both, you presumably childless, haggard galley wench? And why was there a need to cuss within earshot of a child? I don’t know what business it was of hers or why she even bothered to say it but I had to correct the drunkard, especially since she probably didn’t think I heard her.

“Um, it’s actually my 40-gigabyte multimedia player,” I turned to her and said.

“Yeah, IT professionals don’t use portable DVD players,” Ann smirked and added. She should know—she has a BSIT.

“Oh,” the rummy said, no doubt feeling defeated and embarrassed. I glanced at her and Swishy Male Partner as they chose to switch lines after the exchange.

As we were leaving, we saw the two in a longer-than-we’ve-ever-seen line at the snack bar, a line that was not moving. At all.

We smiled and kept walking to the exit. Tony let out a cheer and clapped as Lightning McQueen pushed The King cross the finish line.