Why so tired, you ask? Today was our company’s picnic-slash-*softball tournament which ran until 5 p.m. or so, depending on how well your team fared in the events. (Our department made it to the third round but lost that game.) When it was all said and done I went 3-for-5 between the three games, scored a run and had a few RBIs. Not bad for a guy in his 40s that hadn’t played in a long time.
I also ate a lot but figured if I’m going to be running around then everything will be cool. I also did a lot of people-watching between our games and made some observations:
– I’m glad I lost weight because Lord knows I don’t want to end up like what seemed to be every other guy there, guys resembling Babe Ruth with skinny legs and beer bellies protruding to the point of eclipsing their feet when they look down. Looked like we were playing a gaggle of pregnant men with their size 48 stomachs covered by a shirt and tucked into their size 36 shorts. Give it up, man. You’re not fooling anybody.
– Said individuals took these games, intended to be more fun than anything, way too seriously. Sure, we had some ground rules in place before the game but c’mon, guys, there’s no need to nitpick over the hitting abilities of someone that’s only played a few times in their life, claiming their feeble swing was more of a bunt, which is illegal in softball. If you’re that passionate about a meaningless company softball game, I’d hate to see you at a game that mattered. What a bunch of asshole crybabies.
– Softball is perfect for these guys, whiny bizznitches that no longer have the eye-hand coordination to hit a fastball nor the physical ability to run down a fly ball or steal a base. They’d be winded after one inning of hardball.
– My issue was about the batting orders and position players. I was placed at the bottom of the lineup for the first two games and rotated into position every two innings because we had so many people. This didn’t set to well with me because I attended each practice we had over the last two weeks and there were people I’d never seen before hitting way before me and playing the field while I sat and waited. Kind of screwed if you ask me.
I didn’t take many pictures but I did post a few on my Facebook account. I will post them here tomorrow since, well, the computer’s in the living room and my aching body just feels so damned relaxed here in the bed.
That’s all, folks. The sandman awaits.
* Why didn’t I just use a / instead of spelling it out? Who knows…
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