In Praise of “Thank You”

So I was walking into the building a few minutes ago and held the door open for the guy behind me who was carrying a briefcase.

He didn’t say “thank you.” No biggie; nobody says it anymore anyhow.

I continue to the stairway–I never take the elevator–and the guy is still behind me and quickly approaching. He must be in a hurry, I thought.

I fling the first door to the stairway open and knowing homeboy was still behind me, I held it once again. Still no word from him. Then I reach the second door and hold it for him. Not a word.

Okay, now it’s time to seriously fark with the guy.

Now my usual reaction to something like this is to loudly say “Oh, you’re welcome!” in a sarcastic tone. But because I was at work and had my nametag/security door activator attached to my person, a different strategy was in order.

He was still on my tail in a hurry to get where he needed to go. So I, being a rather big guy, decided to casually stroll smack-dab in the middle and slowly up the first flight of stairs. And being that I was carrying my backpack, I was even more of an obstacle. Hey, I wasn’t in a hurry and I didn’t say a word.

I wasn’t halfway up when all of a sudden, Briefcase Man makes an about-face and decides to take the elevator.

So to Briefcase Man, let me offer some advice: Two little words make all the difference. Let this be a lesson to you, asswipe. Maybe you’ll learn that someday.

But I doubt it. You can’t fix stupid.