Participation is Optional

As the holidays roll into the workplace, along with them come the usual festivities: gift exchanges, feasts, all that other stuff that go along with them.

My office is no exception.

About a month ago we dedicated a portion of our Monday morning meeting to choosing when we would have our annual Thanksgiving feast, which was today. From that point it was up to the organizer to distribute a checklist of which employee was going to bring so that she could have an accurate record of all the food.

Near the bottom of the list was the phrase “Participation is Optional” for those of us who had already decided not to attend for whatever reason.

I chose to exercise that right yesterday which was when the organizer approached me and asked what dish I was going to bring to the event, a dish being the only real requirement for attendance. Well, not necessarily a requirement but more of a cordial thing to do.

She gave me my options which were down to one thing: bread. I told her I’d text Ann and see if should pick something up for me. Ann suggested dinner rolls since those always seem to be in short supply at my Thanksgiving feast. Sounded good to me.

When she came around to check I told her that I could bring some dinner rolls.

“Oh, already have someone bringing those,” she insisted in a pushy manner. She then rattled off a few other items I could bring, one of which was gravy.

“And we’ll need a lot of it because there will be lots of mashed potatoes.”

At this point, another coworker joined the conversation and told me that Costco had some kind of humungo tub of gravy for $6 a barrel or something.

“Would you be able to go to Costco for that,” she said, implying that everybody has a membership (which I do, but it wasn’t in me to drive down there on such short notice).

I smirked and said, “Probably not. And I don’t live around the corner from here so getting it here prepared and not making a mess would be difficult.” The freeway drive is never predictable and one slam of the brakes would mean my car could end up smelling of gravy for weeks, if not the remainder of my finance term.

The questions all began to be a bit too much for me. It’s a simple lunch, not Presidential Visit. As she held the checklist and the other coworker continued to pontificate about Costco, I threw up my hands, looked at the “Participation is Optional” at  the bottom of the list and made my choice.

“Just…mark me off the list. I’m not going.”

Here’s the way things work with me. If something gets to this point and is not all that important in the grand scheme of things, it’s much easier to just dismiss myself from said event and be done with it. I will simply walk away and not care. The organizer seemed to be really pushy with what she wanted me to bring and even though I was getting annoyed by it all, she kept pressing. Too much for just a simple lunch with people you see every day. I was done and over it.

She came back to my desk later and tried once again to get me to go by “making arrangements for someone else to bring the gravy so you could bring the dinner rolls” but nope, I wasn’t budging.

“No need. I’m not going.”

So that was it; my mind was made up. I didn’t buy anything, packed a lunch for the day and planned on taking an extended lunch in my car (and taking a little nap, too). The way things work is that if the event is company sponsored, you can still leave at your normal ending time even if the event ran a bit longer than your traditional lunch period. Mine is 30 minutes but this was scheduled to last 1.5 hours, so I would definitely have time to enjoy a nap.

The lunch was taking place from 11:30 – 1:30 and right at about 11:30 I started to hear the sound of people taking their dishes to the lounge area. This went on for about 25 minutes before my supervisor went around and started gathering the troops. I continued to plug away at my desk.

“It’s time for our lunch! Are you going?”


“Oh…maybe? Okay…” She walked off and returned a few minutes later.

“So why the ‘maybe’?”

“I didn’t bring anything.”

“Oh, that’s fine. Don’t worry about it. There’s plenty of food!”



I’m posting this from my phone because honestly, I’m just too lazy to be sitting at the computer right now. But this post is to let y’alls know that I’ll be absent from here for at least a week.

See, we have a buttload of projects at work this week that all needs to be done by Tuesday. That’s not a lot of time to do all of this so today I, along with some of the veteran proofreaders, were training people from other departments to help us out.

This means some serious overtime the rest of the week including working short shifts on Saturday and Sunday. Not only that but on Thursday and Friday, I will be delivering pizzas for my buddy’s restaurant. I wasn’t planning on doing it this week but unfortunately, his mother passed away over the weekend so he will need every available person to help him out as he takes care of his personal matters. Yes, it will be a long week but it’s money in the bank and with our office being closed the week of Christmas, all the OT is adding up and has made up for that week off. It will also come in handy during the vacation should we want to go play in the local mountain snow.

So at any rate, I’ll be working my rear end off between the two jobs and spending my evenings lounging around the house in lingerie taking it easy so there won’t be much time for anything else.

Wait, you saw that? Oh…well, uh, anyway…just seeing if you were paying attention. I’m just taking advantage of a job situation that’s not exactly the norm in today’s economy. Can’t really blame me, can you?

I’ll be back whenever things get back to normal. Not sure when that will be but I promise I will.

Thanks again 🙂

Happy Bank Transfer Day

Long before Bank of America – or BofA (Bunch of Assholes) – decided to start charging a $5 monthly debit card fee, representatives from my employer’s credit union were on site in the hopes of soliciting new clients.

They had been there in the past and for whatever reason I never opted to open an account. But this time there was a bit of an incentive: existing members who referred new members would get a $30 bonus added to their accounts as would the new members.

A co-worker was more than eager to get that money and so was I, so I signed up and used her as my referral and about a week later we both had $30 in our accounts.


Prior to this (and before all these malcontents started sleeping in tents outside city halls and such), I had mentioned to Ann that with the way the banks were going, I wanted our money out of Huge Corporate Bank immediately. We’d been screwed by Wells Fargo and then Chase who merged with Washington Mutual and made a huge clusterfuck out of it. I was never more unhappy with a bank in my life.

Then there’s BofA whom we couldn’t balance with no matter how hard we tried and curiously, with whom all of our transactions matched. There was obviously something wrong with someone’s math since we are really picky with our accounts. But I guess nobody will ever miss a few pennies here and there, right? Multiplied by, I dunno, thousands? It’s money in the bank and never my account.

Shortly after opening my credit union account, I canceled my Direct Deposit with BofA and started to deposit the money I was making from delivering pizzas. It started to add up and was looking good. And once my Direct Deposit cancellation went into effect I began putting my checks into the credit union, assuring that BofA would never get any more of my money. (An aside: the credit union offers check deposits via smartphone which, I had to admit, rocks like nothing else. I deposit them from my desk every payday.)

Now the only thing left to do is for Ann to cancel her Direct Deposit so that we can finally get rid of BofA once and for all. Until then, there’s only a few bucks left in the account while the credit union balance continues to grow with all of the overtime I’m working. Not only that, we’ve been getting interest with our accounts. It may not be much but it’s more than BofA ever gave us.

So as far as I’m concerned I’m done them, which prompted me to do the following:


Happy Bank Transfer Day, BofA.