There are some things you have to accept as the absolute truth.
For example, water doesn’t like Simon LeBon. Falling lenses are attracted to rocks. And guys, lets face it–women do fart.
But after today, I’d like to add one more witticism to that list: New furniture is evil. Well, I guess I should clarify that a little more. New furniture is evil only in a home with pets and a child (or children).
Here’s the deal. Last weekend, we filled our living room with all-new furniture after canceling our order with a local furniture store. It needed to be done since the furniture we ordered in July has been “in the water” from the Philippines for the last few weeks, and must still go through U.S. Customs when it arrives. In short, we didn’t know when we’d ever get it and since we got tired of sitting on cinder blocks and Foremost milk crates, we had to do something. (We are still waiting for our refund–nearly $1,800.)
At any rate, we’ve had this set–a couch, love seat, coffee table and end table–for less than a week and it has already been soiled by every living thing in this home, save for myself and Ann. And the betta fish.
Here’s a breakdown of what’s happened. First, Anthony fell asleep on it and although it’s covered, left a puddle of drool on it. Thankfully, it came off after some gentle cleaning.
A day later our cat Ozzie was trying to make a hasty retreat from dog Arliss when he jumped on and slid across the end table–and dug his claws into it, leaving some nasty marks that not even one of those touch-up pens could cover. Ann went out and bought a piece of clear Plexiglas to place over the end table in the hopes it wouldn’t happen again. And so far, it hasn’t.
And today, Anthony–there’s that name again–was reaching over (not around as Mom suggested) our stained-glass fireplace screen when he accidentally knocked it over. It came into contact with the coffee table, denting and scratching it as well as cracking the fireplace screen.
So here’s some advice for you all. If you have pets or kids or plan on having kids in the near future, save your money and keep your old furniture. Trust me on that.
Now playing: Frank Black – Headache