The Big Chair

5268I had to make a quick run to the store on Saturday to pick up a few forgotten items for our Mother’s Day lunch. While on my way to the store I came across a chair that somebody was throwing out. Huge “FREE” sign on it and all.

Being that I was driving the Lincoln LS I simply had no room to haul the thing home, I called Ann and inquired if she wanted it. She agreed, so I drove home and me and The Kid then hopped into the Escape to bring home the booty.

The Mission-style chair looked to be in decent shape from my previous drive-by but upon closer inspection–and the removal of a plastic tarp resting upon it–there appeared to be some kind of dry, powdery substance on the cushion. Knowing we have an upholstery cleaner at home, I then sized up the chair, put the 60 side of the 40/60 folding rear seats down, and began to shove it into the truck. Fortunately, it didn’t stink.

Then it hit me:

  • The chair was fucking huge
  • The chair was fucking heavy
  • The chair was not even a chair–it’s a recliner!

Risking another hernia I shoved the recliner into the Escape and trudged my way to the grocery store. When I returned, Ann and I went straight to work and cleaned the chair from top to bottom. And it looks good.

The next task that awaited me was getting the damned thing into the house and then the bedroom. As previously stated, the chair is big. So big, in fact, that I had to put it on its side as I shoved it through the front door. But it wasn’t over yet.

From there I had to figure out a way to move the chair from the living room into the bedroom where it would blend perfectly with our Mission-style decor. (I love Mission style–can you tell?) Again, because of its size, I had to put it on its side and slide it down the hallway. This time, however, there was a problem: I had tilted it the wrong direction because I couldn’t angle it in a way to get it past the bed.

Back it went through the hallway and into the living room. I rolled it around on its other side, slid it down the hallway and into the room and wouldn’t you know it, I hit another obstacle (in addition to scraping the arm on a nail I failed to remove when we took out the carpeting). While I was able to get it into the room this time, I couldn’t move the bed or dresser enough to make room for it.

So now I had to lift the chair onto the bed, take a quick break and then get back to work. Shoving the dresser as close to the closet as I possibly could, I then slowly rolled the chair off the bed and *THUNK* onto the floor.

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The thing now resides in the corner of our bedroom and looks damn good, despite the few scratches it suffered while in the hands of Dave’s Moving and Storage. I don’t care if we never use it as a recliner; I like where it is and it’s very comfortable and relaxing in the room. (And never mind the bag or purses in the background. Ann is weeding through them and we just have no place to put them!)

But best of all–it was free!

Ah, onto other things. I’ve been desperate for some new ringtones / alerts so I added a few just to shake things up. The first two are actually alerts for text messages that I thought would be pretty funny. I added the Star Tours Boarding Chime because it’s something I always wanted to have but never really bothered too look for. I finally found it, used BitPim, and now it’s on my phone.

The second one is pretty cheesy but funny–at least to me. I’ve never watched the Power Rangers but I know enough to know that their communicators emit this really cool monotone Power Rangers theme. I first heard this as a ringtone when we went to the Depeche Mode show as someone there had it. It cracked me up so I just had to get it for myself.

Third is a ringtone and I had to use a fantastic program called Vixy to get it: “The French Mistake” musical number from Blazing Saddles. It goes from the beginning of the song up to “Viola!” and it now Ann’s ringtone since that’s her favorite part of the movie. (God bless you, Dom DeLouise!)

That’s all, folks. It’s almost 11 p.m. and I gotta pack my backpack for work since I’m riding on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.

See ya!

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2 thoughts on “The Big Chair

  1. Congrats on your acquisition. I love free furniture. For many many years, my home was furnished in the style of “found on a street curb.” In fact, my sofa is a neighbor’s sofa who was going to toss it out but I managed to wrangle, for free, before it even hit the curb. Shabby chic has nothing on me.


    1. Thanks. To paraphrase The Dude in “The Big Lebowski,” that recliner really ties the room together. The way I see it, if you can fix it up and / or clean it, there’s no shame in that.


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