Everyday Life, Humor, Random Thoughts, Thoughts, Work

Random Work Thoughts


Here’s just a random slice of some of the things that went through my head today, as jotted in my iPod Touch and e-mailed to me once I got home where I added the links.

Note that there was nothing special about taking notes today; I just wanted felt like doing it.

Enjoy!

(Regarding the signing of a birthday card of someone I don’t know): If I do, I do; if I don’t, I don’t.

What the fuck is that squeaking?

Tom Waits would never win American Idol, and that’s cool with me (and probably Tom Waits, too).

Come on, 3:30…

Who really let the dogs out?

The good thing about riding to work today: lots of calories burned. The bad: I’m tired as Hell.

Damn, that lady has one ugly kid. Poor thing fell from the Ugly Tree and hit every branch on the way down.

I hate sales reps.

Just saw that kid’s mom up close. Bastard never had a chance.

(With each paper I flip through): This job sucks, kill me now…this job sucks, kill me now…

“Cross over to Bridgeburger, and cross over to pleasure!” (It’s doubtful many people will get that. Do you?)

Is it 3:30 yet?

I still don’t have a computer at my desk but I don’t seem to mind because when someone asks if I got “the e-mail,” I can enthusiastically point to the gaping hole on my desk where the computer should be.

We (Ann and I) were so much better off financially in 2006. What the Hell happened?

Damn carpetbaggers…

(Soto voce, while playing on my iPod): “Yesterday…all my troubles seemed so far away…now it looks as though they’re to stay…oh, I believe in yesterday…”

Boom! Headshot!

Can’t wait until our Disneyland Annual Passes are not blocked out. I need an escape for a few hours–or a day.

Woah, who needs Dinseyland? I just totally disconnected from work for a minute there. I need to remember how I did it so I can do it again for…the next 6.5 hours.

My muse must be summoned, and now.

I wonder what they are going to be filming at the park (which was used for Dexter not long ago). Guess I have to make a sidetrip on my way home today. (Update: methinks it was a commercial and not a big production.)

I can’t believe some people use an AOL e-mail address for their business–how tacky. Yeesh, even I have a personalized account and who the Hell am I? But much like those who have the Jesus fish on their ads, a business with an @AOL address immediately tells me who to avoid.

Think of a story for a book. Write it. Kiss this job goodbye.

“Hello, Mudda…hello, Fadda…”

I seriously think I’m having a nervous breakdown. (A few seconds pass.) Nope, just bored out of my effing skull.

Did my supervisor just refer to me as John?

If I keep blocking Status Updates from Facebook “Friends” I might as well cancel my account. (Thinks.) No, I just need to spend less time there.

(Upon overhearing “Margaritaville” playing on the piped-in radio station in the office): Jimmy Buffett sucks. Fuckin’ a, he sucks. STFU, you fucking idiot. Who enjoys that shit you call music?

(While listening to Loretta Lynn’s “When the Tingle Becomes A Chill“): I should really write a country song.

Oh, leave me alone already…

Why did that Rice Crispies Square taste kind of pickly?

It’s 3:30. Thank God.

…and that’s what runs through my brain most of the time. Be afraid.

One more thing. I found the infamous Pimps N’ Hos picture that I mentioned in this post. In fact, a cropped version is now my new banner but if you want to see the uncropped version, here you go:

pimps-n-hos-lo

Note that the picture was found in a kitchen drawer and sustained some damage, but it’s still not that bad.


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2 thoughts on “Random Work Thoughts”

  1. dude. you should just write a book of your random thoughts throughout the day. i’d buy one.

    “I seriously think I’m having a nervous breakdown. (A few seconds pass.) Nope, just bored out of my effing skull.”

    That’s GOLD, Jerry! Comedy GOLD!

    p.s. tell those @#$%s in the league office to get you a computer, stat.

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    1. I’ll hold you to your word and let you know when I get a book deal. The computer can really wait. I have no effing idea how the Hell they look up stuff in the system, which is fine with me. I can play the innocent and get away with it.

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