They’re Back…But Why?

Look, I’ve never claimed to be the picture of today’s fashion. I just sort of evolve and blend in as I always have and probably will continue to do.

But I’ve noticed recently that there’s been an 80s fashion trend with the male Abercombie-and-Fitch-shirt-wearing crowd that is slowly coming back, much like some things that many thirty-something ladies would rather forget.

I’m talking about are Turbo sunglasses.

I seem to recall one time when these things we cool, and that was back in the early 80s when I might have gotten my picture taken in a photo booth at Knott’s Berry Farm wearing those Turbo sunglasses and a baseball concert shirt from The Police’s “Ghost in the Machine” tour. I also might have had a brick-sized “portable” AM/FM/cassette with auto-reverse and Dolby NR Walkman, braces on my teeth and one of those butt-ugly Pittsburgh Pirate hats. (Note: I actually do have the picture I have just described but cannot locate it at the moment. Trust me–it’s a classic.)

And by the way, I never spent more than $2.50 for my Turbo shades–and at the swap meet to boot. $10  could have stocked me up for life, or at least the life of the trend.

I think that may have been the only time wearing such sunglasses may have been acceptable. But ladies, don’t feel left out. You have your own sunglass trend for today too, made popular by just about every celebrity: oversized sunglasses, or what I prefer to call The Brett Somers look.

Turbo sunglasses looked good in the 80s, sure. But flash-forward to 2003 (in my um, fatter days)…

…hmm, perhaps not so much.

Five years later my opinion remains unchanged, although there are possibly worse choices out there.

So let’s stop this evil fashion trend before it spreads. The next time you see a person wearing those Turbo sunglasses, just sock ’em in the eye and tell the Corey Hart called and not only wants his career back, but his ridiculous shades, too.