Out the entire list, this was probably the easiest one to think of.
Ann and I used to frequent Laughlin, NV back before we had a kid and also had less financial obligations. We always stayed at the Ramada Express (now Tropicana Express) because they had some of the cheapest rooms and friendliest staff.
One year we went and it was a blistering 110 degrees and windy. We decided to stay inside the hotel most of the time until it cooled down which was, well, never.
After a few hours of gambling and eating a buffet dinner, we made our way over to the karaoke bar to watch a few people have their moment in the spotlight. There was a woman onstage who was just finishing up her song as we took our seats. As she affixed the mic to the stand, a guy slowly walked up to it and today’s song (in karaoke form, obviously) began to play loudly.
The man, an African-American gentleman in his 30s, slowly swayed to the beat of the music and looked up now and then as if he had no idea where he was. Then he grabbed the mic and started to “sing” the song.
Ann and I looked at each other and just began to laugh. This poor dude tried to dance but had absolutely no rhythm and his vocal style was lacking heart, substance, everything. It was so bad that we had to sit around and watch his entire performance which, as you can guess, didn’t get any better.
The song he was singing was “Word Up” by Cameo (1986).
I know that singing karaoke isn’t exactly the ruler by which you should measure anyone’s vocal prowess but man, this guy was hysterical. So bad, in fact, that Ann and I still sing the song in the same drab manner as this guy did even when we hear it today, which is why I chose it.
Sadly, I don’t think even Larry Blackmon’s codpiece could have helped this fellow’s performance.
What was seen cannot be unseen…
Holographic Meatloaf: The Official Blog of Some Guy Named Dave 